I have always been a day-dreamer. I remember shooting baskets in our backyard for hours, dreaming about this and that, where I was going, and what I was going to do. It was an amazing time that I loved. It was half-exercise and half contemplation. But I doubt that those dreams actually changed much in my life.
The dreams were interesting. They were colorful and exciting, and I did great and amazing things. I conquered the world. I discovered new planets. I was elected as president. Every child has dreams like this, and that’s okay—it’s only the dream of a child. But what happens when adults dream in this manner.
As a preface, don’t interpret this post as bashing dreams. I think dreams are very valid and a healthy part of life. It is good to dream of good things. But two caveats:
1) If the object of the dream becomes the dream itself, then it is no longer a good dream. For example, if I dream of getting a BMW because I want a BMW to gratify myself, it is no longer a good or helpful dream. I am substituting God’s goodness for temporal and unsatisfying pleasure.
2) Any dream that does not change my life is not a true dream. By true dream I mean that any concept which means so much to me that I dream about it, it must affect the way I live my life. If I want to buy a house, then my lifestyle in an apartment would change in a way that would help me to prepare for buying a house. I would start saving money and researching the steps necessary to buy that house. If I was unwilling to start saving or start researching, than that dream is not a “true” dream because it does not actually affect change in my life.
With these guidelines in mind, do your dreams actually qualify as valid, good dreams? Or do you waste your time daydreaming about things that provide no benefit to your life. The most poignant example of this, I think, is that of marriage. I know (and have known) lots of folks (primarily girls) who were ga-ga over the concept of getting married… (And of course, this applies to guys as well…) But what we should do is take a step back from the situation and say, “I’m not married now, so what should I do in my life to prepare for that?” You see, the dream is affecting life because it is changing the manner of living.
If I dreamed of playing in the NBA, it would be prudent of me to play basketball and prepare. I would be at the gym as soon as it was open, shooting, dribbling, passing and playing games. I can dream all I want, but it won’t take me anywhere.
I have certain goals and dreams in my life. I must constantly remind myself that these goals don’t happen overnight or intrinsically. Dreams come to fruition because of intense work that is completed right now, not tomorrow.
You see, that’s the beauty of dreams. It motivates you to prepare for the future because of the goodness and excitement you see in the dream. Now the key is to consider your dreams, watching to see if they positively influence who you are and where you are going.

What happens when you’re equally afraid of two contradictory concepts, say X and Not-X. Logically, you cannot choose to have X and not have X at the same time, so they are, in theory, completely separate and non-relatable.
Both of these options present an equal amount of fear. You have to choose only one. Which one do you choose? Do you refuse to choose either?
Well, with any choice, there is usually a default answer. For example, I want to travel to Greece. I can choose to travel to Greece or I can choose not to travel to Greece. A lot of times we suppose the latter isn’t really a choice, but in spite of its default status (I’m not in Greece, so therefore I am continuing to choose not to visit Greece), it is a passive choice made in the mind. Even considering the passivity used in making the decision, it still causes an action in my life.
So back to my question…what do you choose if each option is equally perplexing?
I think you choose the one where you currently are. Or at least you choose whichever is closer to your current position. Fear breeds more fear and leads to an inability to change, therefore if you are afraid of X and Not-X, you will likely choose Not-X because you have not actively decided to choose X.
Why is this? I’m not sure what causes this complacency and fear, but I would wager that everyone suffers from this to a certain degree. These topics aren’t the standard fodder of friendly conversation, but I do watch decisions from afar and perhaps assume that they are made because of such fears. And like all things in life, I suffer from this like the rest.

Do you ever wonder if we only get one chance to do something? Do you wonder if situations are ripe for one response, and that if you miss it, you will never have the chance again?
I do.
Life reminds me of baseball. The batter is only guaranteed one pitch when he makes his way to the plate. One pitch. He can choose to watch it fly by him or take a crack at hitting it. If he doesn’t hit the ball well, he’ll fly out or be thrown out at first base. And if he watches the pitch zing past him, he could have missed a great opportunity to make it on base.
But life, like baseball, is so much more complicated than that. We all get a chance at hits, but sometimes the hittable balls just aren’t there. You can watch and hope and pray, but you may never get the right ball. You may walk to first base or you could strike out without moving your bat. And it’s difficult to know if you did the right thing in those situations.
I just hope that I don’t always plan to get on base because of a walk. And I hope that I haven’t missed the opportunities for home runs in the past… And knowing that I have, I hope to watch and swing proactively, knowing I may never get the same chance again.

While I was driving home the other day, I saw an old Lexus GS 400 in the lane next to me. It brought back memories of high school because that was my favorite car during the late ’90′s. I thought it was a great car with impressive performance: I mean, 290hp…that’s awesome (and much better than the 88hp in my dad’s Honda Accord).
But I drove by and thought, “Ahh, it’s really not that nice anymore.”
And I thought about how I dreamed of driving something like that 8 years ago, but now it was just another car on the road. I looked around at other nice cars as I finished my drive home: there were lots of nice cars, but there were even more nicer cars.
You see, I desired that car because it was one of the best back then. And now I desire other cars because they are nicer now. But the funny thing is that in a couple years, the next model will come out, and it will be sexier and more powerful. And so many of us will rush to replace the old model with the newer, prettier one.
Of course, I’m not lambasting anyone for buying a new car, but it made me realize how fleeting our desires are. When we cherish and fawn over material items, we fail to realize how they don’t actually hold the key to happiness. We think, “If I could only have this, I would be happy.” But truly, we are fooling ourselves by trying to be happy through stuff.
Because next year I’ll see the newer model that will make me happier. And I’ll trade in for that while missing out on the things that make me happy. Sad, isn’t it…

We pick the facts that represent our side of the story and obscure the ones that don’t line agree.
Last Saturday, I talked to a girl about the Mavs / Spurs series. She was a Spurs fan (sadly) and was pointing out all of the injustices that had hampered the Spurs. The evidence was spurious, at best, but to her, it was perfect proof that Mark Cuban had swayed the refs. I pointed out some alternate facts, but she didn’t want any part of them because she was predisposed to believing something else.
The facts that didn’t fit within her worldview were eliminated; they didn’t seem to be facts because they didn’t line up with her a priori beliefs.
I think the same is true with Al Gore and many climate scientists: they are predisposed to believing that global warming is an imminent threat to our world. They grab onto every piece of evidence that supports their thesis while suppressing all of the other facts. It is possible that it is true of the Climate Scientists that don’t believe in the theory of global warming.
The problem with most of us is that we rarely consider information that doesn’t fit within our worldview. This makes change difficult because we don’t ever look at opposing facts. I’m not proposing that we should accept any and all facts, but I do know that we miss so much because we refuse to interpret all of the facts. We should definitely try to examine all of the evidence before we make our conclusions.

I have long believed that schools have been failing to prepare students for dealing with the insane amount of information in the world. Everything seems to be “repeat this fact after me;” then I’ll test you on it until your brains rot away. The better way would be: “Here’s the information, and I’m going to help you understand how to remember the concepts and how to find the details when you need them.”
This from Creating Passionate Users: [Moving up the wisdom hierarchy]

If we could teach kids in elementary school just one thing (besides reading), my wish is that it would be systems thinking. But too much of even our adult training/education (including much of what I create) is focused on short-term “just-the-facts-mam” or how-to hacks and tutorials. We obviously need reference info and how-to’s, or everything comes to a grinding halt, but without the higher elements of understanding and wisdom, we might never recognize that the thing we’re learning to do is NOT the right choice!

Definitions are an integral part of life. They provide and ability to communicate. Without them, the words I just wrote would be meaningless, because none would be defined. And if none were defined, what I wrote would mean something to me and nothing to anyone else, unless, of course, I shared my definitions with the world.
Noah Webster did an amazing thing for the English language–he took the words in existence and gave actual and reasonable definition to them. By doing this, he slowed the evolution of language and created a better environment to share ideas.
The same thing is true of measurements. Architects can design buildings that builders can build (awkward, huh?) because they all share a common system a measurement. If a foot is six inches long to some people and 12 inches long for others, what does it mean to anyone? Nothing.
This all reminds me of the importance of choosing your words wisely. If you define a word differently than everyone (or most everyone) else, then you should be extremely hesitant in using that word. If no one has any idea what that word means, or even worse, if they define it differently, you are putting yourself in a situation where people can misuse or fail to understand your comments. And that’s not a good deal.

The restaurant was filled with booths spiraling about the room with a simple open space in the center. No one knows why that space was open; some say the architect intended to put a fountain there; others claimed it was for live music. But it was wasted space.
It was a busy Friday evening, and the manager hated to see that space wasted. The restaurant brimmed out the door with anxious patrons, each waiting for a seat. Seats were so scarce that the manager placed one additional table in that open space.
No one wanted to take that table. It was in the center; it was the spectacle table. Because of its central placement, everyone in the restaurant could see the table. Everyone knew that table would be the main conversation course for everyone else.
A man pushed his way to the front of the line and placed his name on the waiting list. He began to turn and walk away, but he noticed the open table in the center. He asked the hostess, “What about that table over there? Is there any way we could sit there?”
Annoyed, she blurted back, “You sure you want that table?”
“Yes, oh yes. We’d like to go ahead and have dinner.”
The man and his family were soon seated at the table. Immediately they noticed the scores of eyes now parked on them. The restaurant noise faded into a gentle whirl of whispered comments, comments that were likely about the unlucky family in the center.
The man began to become upset. He couldn’t believe the nerve of the people in the restaurant. “How dare they look at us and talk about us.”
His rage slowly increased as the night progressed. They ordered their drinks and entrees, and you could practically see steam rising from his head. He dreamed of standing on the table and asking the restaurant why they were all talking about him.
Sure, he hadn’t actually heard a single word spoken about him, but he knew…he just knew that was what everyone was talking about. And his wife and kids didn’t miss a beat either: they dropped comments and were just as irritated as the man.
Finally the man couldn’t stand it any longer. He asked for the manager.
The manager came by the table and apologized for their inconvenience. Unfazed, the man tore into the manager about their horrible experience. The manager stood in silence, taking in everything the man had to say. After several minutes of caustic complaining, he ran out of breath and finished.
The manager apologized once again, and asked if he could offer an explanation. The man agreed.
“Be careful of the things you complain about. Life is often determined by the choices you make and inferences you take. And sometimes the noise that seems to be against you is no more than noise.
“And please, let me take care of your dinner tonight.”
And with that, the manager walked away.

I was driving home the other night, and I noticed how great it is to drive at night. The roads are empty, the stoplights are short (and more likely to be green), and the cops are fewer.
And I started to think: what if you could take all of the cars that travel one stretch of road, and average them out over the course of the entire day? Instead of having two hours of crazy traffic every day, you had 24 hours of steady even traffic. By that standard, even the busiest roads would still be under their capacity.
Of course this scenario isn’t feasible, but it’s an interesting thought.
I think our lives are the same way as traffic. Every day we have several hours of extreme busyness–busyness to the point of not really getting much done, just like we sit in traffic every morning and evening. And our capacity is woefully underused.
We have the capacity to do so much, but because of poor time management and bad lifestyle choices, we waste so much time. Instead of doing something productive, I can find myself on my couch for several hours in a night. And what do I do when I’m sitting on the couch? Well, I watch some sitcom of course.
By its nature Watching television isn’t bad, but if you spend too much time watching tv, you are wasting your natural capacity.