A Guide to Careers
Kids -- are you still in the process of deciding which career you want to choose? Or have you finished college and chosen the wrong one? In either situation, this quick guide will help you match your skills to a new career.
Are you constantly wrong? Do you always seem to bet for the team that loses? And do you wish you could have a job where it's okay to be wrong? Then TV Weatherman is for you. They're never right.
Do you like to eat? And do you like people who know what good food is and cherish the experience? Then you should work for a church. They know what a lunch break is.
Do some people say that your are a habitual liar? Can you say one thing to a person and completely change your opinion when you talk to the next? Then you should be a lawyer. They never tell the truth.
Do you struggle getting any work done? Can you never seem to complete a task? And does the efficiency of other workers baffle you? Then you should be a bureaucrat. They never get anything done.
Do you struggle making difficult decisions? Do you struggle making any decisions? Do you want to please everyone? Then you should be a politician. They can never decide anything without a poll.
Do you feel like the world hates you? Do you feel like you are the step-child of the entire world? And do you feel like making sure that the world knows that it's not your fault? Then you should be the mayor of New Orleans. He can't decide whether to blame Bush or God for the damage.
Do you like for people to give you money? Do you care for the people that give you money? And do you often stick your foot in your mouth? Then you should be a Televangelist. They can't decide whether to do good things or say stupid things.
Do you like functional things? Do you want to make sure the world works correctly? And do you dislike attractive and pleasing things? Then you should be an engineer. Their creations may work, but they sure are ugly.
Do you like to frustrate people? Do you wish to leave your footprint on the lives of people everyday? Do you want to make them stare at your handiwork every morning and afternoon? Then you should be a traffic engineer. Everyday you sit and stare at three colors of their creation: green, yellow and red.
Do you like power? Do you like to see fear in people's eyes? Then you should be a traffic police officer. They love to flip on those lights and that siren.
And lastly, do you know it all? Or do you think you know it all? Can you comment about every subject known to man, think you're right, but still be wrong? Then you should be a journalist. They never tell the whole story.